Whether you’re always on the fence or just waiting in hope that everything will turn out, it’s all about struggling with that hard decision – to make a decision. What if it’s not about the specific choices you’re presented, but that you simply have to make one.
It’s a hard look I’ve had to take at myself. I struggle with making decisions because I’m scared of being responsible for negative outcomes and have a paralyzing fear of failure.
I end up more often than not deferring to the decision of others, taking a path of inaction or, frankly, predictability.
Why? Like many, at both menial and critical times, I doubt my wisdom, my foresight, my life skills, my potential.
I don’t want to be the reason everyone has a mediocre time because I picked the wrong restaurant. Even though I know I can be a meticulous perfectionist, I’m scared to carry the weight of a major undertaking in case I…don’t bring honour to us all?! Oh, the shame!
What happened? What made me accept my own floaty, back seat, random behaviour? I used to feel like I had vigorous ambition and drive. Now I just feel tired and old.
I used to attribute my past decisiveness to youthful energy and naivety. Maybe that excitement I had about the boundless opportunity in the world, waiting for discovery, just lost its lustre over the years.
But, I’m now realizing I just became complacent with life. Being satisfied, even confident, with the “I could have’s”, instead of doing the work to say “I did”.
Isn’t the truth that it takes less effort to live in grey area? Just let things play out and see how the cards fall? But, unfortunately, being in limbo results in melancholy, you’re not sad – but not happy, either.
When you make a decision, you set in to motion a path of action and intention to move forward. It can turn out positive or sideways, but you have to bet on yourself .
Take the chance so that something, anything, happens instead of delaying action and settling for the easiest outcome.
More on that, being stuck in the vortex of over-analyzation can cause more anxiety than just picking something and sticking to it.
If life’s like one of those choose-your-own-adventures, putting down the book doesn’t get you anywhere.
Of course, there’s something to be said about taking a break and getting that rejuvenating down time needed to recharge and really weigh your options in life.
But, recharging is not Candy Crushing and trashy TV-ing to avoid and distract from action (my fave activities, for sure).
Make a decision to achieve, set goals, make a list of to-dos, create a timeline and enforce deadlines.
Or else, all of a sudden you’re turning 30 and your future self hates you for wasting time. Too personal? haha
Most importantly, you just have to trust yourself and know you can, and will, make new decisions in life and possibly even change your mind to move forward.
I know, easier said than done. Work in progress for me everyday!
What do you do to focus, be decisive and get motivated? #turning30 #quarterlifecrisis #millenials